Guards! guards!

Will finish the book later this evening, this is good stuff. Some quotes:

1. ‘Huh. Wizards. What do they know about a day’s work?’
The Supreme Grand Master breathed deeply. Ah
The air of mean-minded resentfulness thickened noticeably.
‘Nothing, and that’s a fact,’ said Brother Fingers. ‘Going around with their noses in the air, too good for the likes a’us. I used to see ’em when I worked up the University. Backsides a mile wide, I’m telling you. Catch ’em doing a job of honest toil?’
‘Like thieving, you mean?’ said Brother Watchtower…

2. He’d always known he was different. More bruised for one thing. And then one day his father had come up to him or, rather, come up to his waist, and told him that he was not, in fact, as he had always believed, a dwarf. It’s a terrible thing to be nearly sixteen and the wrong species.
‘We didn’t like to say so before, son,’ said his father. ‘We thought you’d grow out of it, see.’
‘Grow out of what?’ said Carrot.
‘Growing.’ […]
‘What is my own kind, then?’ said Carrot bewildered.
The old dwarf took a deep breath. ‘You’re human,’ he said.
‘What, like Mr Varneshi?’ […] ‘One of the big people?’
‘You’re six foot six, lad. He’s only five foot.’ The dwarf twiddled the losse rivet again. ‘You see how it is.’
‘Yes, but – but maybe I’m just tall for my height,’ said Carrot desperately…

3.’You’re saying,’ he said, weighing each word, ‘that we should send Carrot away to be a duck among humans because Bjorn Stronginthearm is my uncle.’

4.’He did what?’
‘I was marched through the streets,’ said Urdo van Pew, currently President of the Guild of Thieves, Burglars and Allied Trades. ‘In broad daylight! With my hands tied together!’ He took a few steps towards the Patrician’s severe chair of office, waving a finger.
‘You know very well that we have kept within the Budget,’ he said. ‘To be humiliated like that! Like a common criminal! There had better be a full apology,’ he said, ‘or you will have another strike on your hands.’ […]
‘The Watch appears to be having some difficulty with the Thieves’ Guild,’ said the Patrician. ‘Van Pew has been in here claiming that a member of the Watch arrested him.’
‘What for, sir?’
‘Being a thief, apparently.’
‘A member of the Watch?’ said the secretary. […]
‘But we don’t do things like that!’ said Vimes [the leader of the watch]. ‘You can’t go around arresting the Thieves’ Guild. I mean, we’d be at it all day!’ […] ‘We’ve got to get him off the streets as soon as possible,’ he muttered. ‘Next thing you know he’ll be bringing in the chief of the Assasin’s Guild for bloody well killing people!’

5. He tried a doorhandle. It was locked. ‘You stick with me,’ he added, ‘and I’ll see you’re all right. Now, you try the handles on the other side of the street.’
‘Ah. I understand, Corporal Nobbs. We’ve got to see if anyone’s left their store unlocked,’ said Carrot.
‘You catch on fast, son.’
”I hope I can apprehend a miscreant in the act,’ said Carrot zealously.
‘Er, yeah,’ said Nobby, uncertainly.
‘But if we find a door unlocked I suppose we must summon the owner,’ Carrot went on. ‘And one of us would have to stay to guard things, right?’
‘Yeah?’ Nobby brightened. ‘I’ll do that,’ he said. Don’t you worry about it. Then you could go and find the victim. Owner, I mean.’

6. In the privacy of the Oblong Office, his personal sanctum, the Patrician paced up and down. He was dictating a stream of instructions.
‘And send some men to paint that wall,’ he finished. [he’s trying to cover up that a dragon had burned a man alive in front of the wall]
Lupine Wonse raised an eyebrow.
‘Is that wise, sir?’ he said.
‘You don’t think a frieze of ghastly shadows will cause comment and speculation?’ said the Patrician sourly.
‘Not as much as fresh paint in the Shades,’ said Wonse evenly.
The Patrician hesitated a moment. ‘Good point,’ he snapped. ‘Have some men demolish it.’


January 2, 2011 Posted by | Books, Terry Pratchett | Leave a comment